My experiments with perfume samplers

Perfume samplers are perhaps most annoying bunch of salesmen out there. They are like urban cowboys with a set of perfume bottles in their holster and will shoot at sight like dirty Harry. It hardly ever happened to me that I went to shopping mall and did not get ambushed by them. Its not seldom I ended up buying one of those expensive perfumes, plus came out smelling like a bouquet.

My sympathies with all those who got scammed like this, welcome to “I got tricked into buying perfume I didn’t like” club. We meet on Thursdays.

For others, I dare you to try once. Go to any mall in India and this is how whole process goes:

  • He will start with, if you like is “Eau de Toilette” or some other phrases you don’t even recognize. That’s your clue, if you are impressed with his knowledge on few European phrases, you are trapped.  Simple psychology is, if you don’t understand what is asking, most probably you will stick with what he recommends
  • Then he will ask which flavor of perfume you like, fruity, nutty or shitty. Don’t answer that – it’s a rhetorical question. He will pull one sample no matter whatever you answer. Don’t get scared, not at least – not yet.
  • Then, like a ninja pulls a ninjastar, he’ll pull one sampling strip. He does it so fast you will be tend to think its magic. If you must ask, go ahead and enquire if he does birthday parties.
  • What he does next is something amusing. He will pose like Usain Bolt, like he did after winning gold. Or maybe it is T’ai chi, you’ll never know. Anyways, He will hold paper strip in one hand and bottle in other with a appropriately calculated distance.
joey tribbiani as perfume sampler
joey tribbiani as perfume sampler
  • Then he’ll spray sample into air, more precise than sparkplug of a four-stroke engine! in slow motion.  I was like – OMG splay it already!
  • Before it disperses into air he will wave the testing strip where he sprayed. It’s like a WOW! This is that exact moment you’ll think this guy really knows what he is doing, and perhaps he is topper in fragrance sampling college.
  • And just when you think he will give it you to sniff, wait, there are more steps! how else would this poor fellow justify overpriced liquid? He will blow air on that perfume strip before handing over to you. Don’t be surprised if it smells like onion-fish fry he had that afternoon.
  • There’s more to procedure if you challenge his choice of perfume. He will make you smell some coffee beans. Then procedure repeats from beginning
  • Finally only four thousand saar ! You pay, then you go home having spent entire days budget in one counter,

share your thoughts,

3 thoughts on “My experiments with perfume samplers

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