Our contract…

Cooking lessons

I know cooking now.., it’s easy. Please try sometime. Rice:

• Open the packet of rice
• Put it in rice cooker, switch on.
• When get switched off, eat it. If something remains eat tomorrow. If some more.. Eat the day after.. and so on.

Rasam

• Prepare Rasam
• Add yesterday’s left over Rasam. Eat it with rice. Leftovers, add it to next day Rasam. Repeat the process till Saturday
• On Sunday, throw the remaining and wash the utensils. Eat pizza.

Maggy

• Put maggy in boiling water.
• Throw the burnt maggy, and eat the eatable chunk of it. Throw the rest

Parantha

• Take it from freezer and put it on hot pan. Eat it with priya pickle.
• Use “chimrta” to turn it in pan. ( if you don’t have one , keep the band-aid ready )

See, I told you… Cooking is not rocket science.

Bhagwan jab deta he

I was on a break, I am still on. It was unexpected one – thanks to Airtel, hutch and her other brothers and sisters for isolating me from the rest of the world. Looks like i will never reach a stage where I “happily did blogging ever after”

ow thank you notes.

•  Airtel, thanks for sending a kid on tenth day to look into my modem problems. I was wondering when you are gonna change that “24X7 to service” to “once in a month service”.
• Hutch, That was very new information, that your SIMs stop working suddenly and you your customer will loose all the data he has in it. Solution of buying a new SIM must be bringing you good money eh?

Other honorable mentions

• Thanks for Credit card guys for auto debiting double the money I spent ( with Rs300 fine). That leaves me penniless, hmm feels good.
• HDFC thanks for sending my checkbook to some village near Hyderabad. for me 600KM is really not a distance. And closing my account without my consent was really smart.
• About heavy brokerage ICICI, hm thats valid. By the way did I buy anything. (This one is latest, need to talk to customer care yet)

old culprits.

• DOmino’s broke a record , by sending a pizza after 2Hrs30Mins. I actually asked him “what made you come so early for my next order”
• “Jon Player” have weak stitchings – in dangerous spot.

I totally agree with “bhagwan jab deta he, chappad phad ke deta he”

Come to my work, I am currently adding 15manhrs per day to Indian economy. I did it on Independence day also. Gandhiji must be really happy, clients weren’t.

Blogoholics

Check your symptoms here. I was tested positive.

in here via pradeep

My Political compass

       Some time back Srik asked me “Whats the difference between a Kerala communist and other communists? Well, Kerala communism is a philosophy by itself. It is “take policies as time changes and completely forget where they started”. In my opinion it is a complete hypocrisy. Infact, communism in India has lost its meaning. If Karl Marks was alive today, he would have definitely taken rat poison.
      For example, there was “Anti Coke Pepsi” campaign few months back. Kerala assembly discussed it for length and finally decided to ban those products. Next day none of the college campuses had Coke and Pepsi but Sprite, Seven-up, Mirinda, Fanta …were available. A curious journalist asked one of the ministers “Why two products alone, why not ban all the products which are proved to have chemicals”. Minister happily said, “Oops … In assembly we did not discuss other drinks at all … he he”.
Another instance is where they have done blunder in their party name itself (my previous post).

Hyderabad blues

This story dates back to two years. I was in Hyderabad then. Those were really wonderful days and we used to call it as “Paid holidays”.

This is about one funny incident (accident), which is still number second most embarrassing moments (first one was i got a degree ). Alright come to the point.. one fine day me and one my colleagues were left for a dinner and suddenly we realized the lift jammed between two floors, power went off. That “colleague” was a “she”, and as expected she started off with “mummyy…:-( “. I too was reluctant to shout for help, cause i din’t want my leg gets pulled ( I love the other way round). We waited for some time , power dint come nor any help. I too was fed up.. how long can you keep singing “Hum tum .. ek kamre me bandh ho….”. We called for help ( hutch has good network )

My retirement plan

I know it is little too early to think about my retirement plan. But if I don’t plan it now , they gonna give me a pigeonhole in some stupid metro after 40 years.

Sea view , dense woods, Shendi Angadi ( arrack shop ) and me. wot say?

Thank god!!! I am still an atheist

My test results :

The Pyrrhonian
The results are in, and it appears that you have scored 55%… Quietly confident and aloof, the Pyrrhonian recognises that religions exist and that people subscribe to them, but manages to keep well out of it all. Pyrrhonians came to the realisation long ago that all matters of faith are beyond the scope of reason or argument, and thus retains a clear-headed skeptical approach to religion in general. They refuse to place belief in anything for which there is no proof, and regard the majority of theistic claims as irreconcilable. Leading a life of tranquility undisturbed by religious concerns, the position of the Pyrrhonian is enviable, if a little frustrating for others at times.

What kind of atheist are you?
created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Apathetic Atheist, Meh… whatever. Apathetic Atheists tend towards disbelief because believing takes more work. These are the people who won’t argue religion, even if a total nutjob confronts them because arguing just seems like a waste of time they could spend doing something else.

Life is stuck,

.. and currently I am

Cartoon by Dave Walker. Find more cartoons you can freely re-use on your blog at We Blog Cartoons.

Dear Domino’s and Subway,

Dear Domino’s and Subway,
Congratulations on loosing one more customer. Thanks for all the wrong deliveries you have done to me. I took long time before I settle down, after trying chapathis of pizza corner, paranthas and pizza hut and vada pav of Marry brown. It was taste and quality that made me keep ordering you. But now, it looks like you misplaced recipe.

Its too late now, I am tired. You both together lost around 1500 Rs business per week. There are some things I want to ask (and shout).

• I repeatedly telling Jalapeño am my favorite. When I say I need more Jalapeño on subway and extra Jalapeño topping on my pizza, I mean “I NEED ““EXTRA” of them. I did not find a single piece of it. Do you know English?
• If you haven’t put Jalapeño, please tell me you haven’t. “It’s embedded inside the pizza”, “it’s in the form of pizza” etc are simply not acceptable. Your delivery boys think I am and lallu-pappu is it?
• When I say “one” it is “one”, when I say “two” I really mean I need “two”. Please don’t send one coke less and argue that is what I ordered. I know my orders and you billed it. Your apologies don’t fill my stomach.